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Saturday, May 30, 2009

Life happens

So I am counting down the days to leave and go back home for the month of June. I know it will be difficult for me to come back. The last few months I have missed just being around my friends and family that I know love me just the way I am. This last year has been trying to say the least, with my father passing away, leaving our church here, and now being pregnant again with number 5 and not expecting that to come out of no where. I feel as though I have been ran through a gamete of emotions and lost all control. Not that I am a big control freak anyway. I am more of a go with the flow kinda girl. Non-the less it has been difficult and I miss the comfort of home.

Here I am reminded of what matters the most to me, and who true friends are. They are the ones who do not let you stand in the fire alone, but are right there with you. I am thankful for the experience and how it has changed me. But, I won't be sad when this chapter of my life closes and a new one opens. It will be a very welcomed change.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

People

People aren't they just funny. Complex creatures made up of there own insecurities that they are always trying to project on those who are not. At times I could just live without them. But, there are a few rare gems you find along the ways. Who carve out new meaning to you and your life. They are the reason I bother. I love them the ones you find by accident in life that you are instantly drawn to and know you will remain friends. The ones you are free to share your life with and be yourself with. It is the few that i have found here in Utah and I love them, there outlook and perspective is inspiring.

It is the ones with the hang ups that think they know it all and are always right about everything I could live with out. They can dish is out by the tons, but cannot take it at all. Who talk the talk but cannot walk the walk. We should all just live and let live! Be kind it won't hurt you nor will it kill you. I understand that there are people who do not know what true relationship is. Maybe because they were not shown it as a child or just have no idea. Even though they often think that they do!

yet again my rant!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Waiting to Exhale

I feel like I am a caged animal, waiting to exhale. Only a few short weeks till school is out and the boys and I are on the open road. Like Dorthy clicking my heels chanting there's no place like home, there's no place like home.

Back to the place where no one cares who you are, what you are doing, what you are wearing or what you are talking about. Where the first questions are not about your religious beliefs, instead it is "Hi, darlin' how are you sugar and would you like some sweet tea". Where neighbors greet each other with comments about the weather or the local high school ball games. Back to the place where your front porch and driveways are social meeting places, the curtains are always open and everyone says hello.

Yes, places like this exist here in America is is called the southwest and I love it. Where people talk so slow that you can think about what you are gonna say next because it will take them ten minutes to finish the sentence they are on. Where no one cares what you believe in. Where being an American still holds pride and street dance happen in the summers along with bbq's and children swimmin' in the creeks and ponds. Where there are shade trees to sit under in the hot summer sun!

So, yes I cannot wait to drive over the mountain's and out of the Zion curtain.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

On the soap box

I am not the kind of person who whines if things do not go my way. I try to not be quick to anger. Though I am quick witted and can come up with some pretty snappy come backs! My husband and I are opposite in that. So when he tries to whine it does not go very far with me. I am the kind of person if you don't like it change it! I feel like we all have areas we could improve upon. Even though most of the time we do not until forced.

Life is not fair and it is what you make of it. I do not like my world being turn upside down,but when it is I try to go with the flow and not stress out. Because, really what does that help? It doesn't.

Another thing on my mind lately is what in world is wrong with people that they feel the need to lie? Are we not adults? Have we really not crossed that bridge? Do we really need to act like we are in high school and talk about people behind there backs while being nicey nicey to there faces? I am so sick of people telling me lies when I flat out point blank ask them something! And it is a simple yes or no answer and they choose to lie! For me to find out later that they are a big fat liar. Do people not understand that we are the example for our kids and if they hear us lying that they will lie. Not that i have not ever been guilty of a lie, because I have and it is not a quality that I am proud to once say was my own. Having kids has changed that all for me. Now that I see that they will and do act like me! It is scary!

Newsflash people it is okay to not be perfect! And you really are not fooling anyone!

Well that is enough of my soap box!