How did I get here?

It seems like only yesterday this year started and now it is almost over. Summer flew by me and I didn't even notice and now winter is upon us. As I approach the birth of our fifth child, I still wonder how did I get here to this place? I will soon have a 9,8,6 and 5 year old and a new baby. With so many uncertainties in life, I still am amazed at the human ability to expand the heart and allow love for one more person in. I know this will be a new adventure being the mother of a daughter, I am excited about the possibilities! Even though I never thought I would be here . It seems like the boys are growing at warp speed and soon I will wake up and they will be gone. Time just keeps marching on. You have those moments that you wish you could just bottle and keep forever. The faces they make, the sound of their laughs, the way they smell after playing in the leaves, the sweet kisses and hugs they give you. I hope they never grow out of cuddling and telling me they love me. I adore being their mother, every painstaking moment at times.

I like bugs more then people!!!

Yes, you would know that I of all people would have a kid that says that! I said what? He said I like them more then humans we connect on a deeper level! You can find him anytime of the day anywhere with some form of animal or bug! They are always nice and if they bite you they are just scared because you are so big! I knew from the moment K2 was born I was in for it. He is so much like me but different at the same time. He beats to his own drum and does not care what others think. Animals he loves! He will sit with a dog for hours. Since we do not have any pets he loves bug and insects. A few days ago he found a praying mantis they pinch so when it pinched his brother, K3 he jumped on it and killed it K2 cried for hours over it. Now he has a katydid we had to tell him they only live for 3 or 4 months. I hope he is not crushed when it dies. I know he will be the one who goes far away to save some strange bug from death! The heart of this child amazes me! He would rather be with bugs or family only not people, because they are not connected! From the mouths of babes comes the truth!

Precious Moments

It is days like today that I am reminded of why I married this man. Because after 14 years of knowing him he is still the one I love. Not often am I mussy so deal with it this once. Watching him with our kids is the most amazing thing. Seeing the ways that they act just like him is beautiful at times. Knowing that no matter what life challenges we face he is always there for me rather I need him to be or not. That he always considers me, and wants to know how I feel about decisions that we have to make. He stands by me in my parenting and makes sure that what I say goes. He knows that he can work 80 hours a week and that the balance of our home life lots of times falls on my shoulders. He is very understanding, yet at the same time when I am wrong he waits for me to realize it instead of throwing it in my face. He is not the arguing type and refuses most times to even do it. He wants to take care of his family. All he ever wanted to be was a daddy and now his dream of having a girl is coming true. Not that he does not love his boys because trust me he does, he just wanted a daughter. I am glad that he is getting that in life to be a father to a little girl that I know will grow up thinking her daddy hangs the moon!

Motherhood

We all have those moments where a child drives us over the edge... The best way that I have found to deal with this to to call a good mommy friend who knows exactly what you are talking about! So you can scream, yell, vent or cry to them about it and they don't think you are crazy! That is unless they are one of those mom's, you know the one's! The one's who pretend like their kids never do anything wrong and that they have never had a moment like that! Yeah right, it you are a mom you have had a moment like that I assure you. I love having friends who know what i am talking about and find some way to make me laugh about it. I know no matter what I am going through that day that I can call her and she will make me laugh about it. It is perfect to have someone who shares your sense of humor and gets you with out having to say a word they know where you are coming from. My kids for the most part are good boys, but trust me they have those days that everything goes wrong and I have to find a way to get them back on track! I love them and I love being a mother, but there are days you can either laugh or cry about things I prefer to laugh!